Originally Posted by
ray1970
I love when the government watches me. I'd love to see some of their reports.
At 05:30... Subject left house and drive to work. Stopped for energy drink and LARGE BAG OF CHEETOS along the way.
From 06:30 to 17:00... Subject was at work all day busting his ass, at approximately 11:30 subject entered restroom with aforementioned Cheetos and a magazine. 12:45 subject exits restroom less one (1) bag of Cheetos but evidence of Cheeto consumption is clearly evident on subjects face, hands and groin area. Subject appears to have a vague, content look about him.
17:00... Subject leaves work and drives directly home, stopping only to purchase another LARGE BAG OF CHEETOS.
Subjects evenings appear to be occupied watching television, playing on the Internet while again evidence of mass Cheetos ingestion is obvious. Subject unsuccessfully attempts mating with female occupant of residence frequently, it appears she questions evidence of cheeto consumption with male occupant in agitated manner. Female subject appears to return to evening ritual of watching television intently and performing some sort of documentation(investigation reveals female subject watches "Lifetime" channel and prefers shows related to wives eradicating spouse and any evidence thereof). Any interupption of female subjects television viewing period by male subject promotes loud verbal altercation with frequent use of profanity.
Male subject hangs head in shameful manner and retreats to kitchen, where yet another bag of cheetos is acquired. Male subject returns to small enclosure in back yard which is adorned with small, canine like treats and toys. Male subject remains in small enclosure until early morning hours.