Obamaflowers

Receptionist: Hello, Welcome to ObamaFlowers, My name is Trina.
How can I help you?

Customer: Hello. I received an email from Professional Flowers stating
my flower order has been canceled and I should go to your exchange to
reorder it. I tried your website, but it seems like it is not working. So I am
calling the 800 number.

Receptionist: Yes! I am sorry about the website. It should be fixed by
the end of November . But I can help you.

Customer: Thanks, I ordered a "Spring Bouquet" for our anniversary,
and wanted it delivered to my wife.

Receptionist: Interrupting, Sir, "Spring Bouquets" do not meet our
minimum standards, I will be happy to provide you with Red Roses.

Customer: But I have always ordered "Spring Bouquets", done it
for years, my wife likes them.

Receptionist: Roses are better, sir, I am sure your wife will love
them.

Customer: Well, how much are they?

Receptionist: It depends sir, do you want our Bronze, Silver,
Gold. or Platinum package.

Customer: What's the difference?

Receptionist: 6, 12,18 or 24 Red Roses.

Customer: The Silver package may be okay, how much is it?

Receptionist: It depends sir, what is your monthly income?

Customer: What does that have to do with anything?

Receptionist: I need that to determine your government flower
subsidy, then I can determine how much your out-of-pocket cost
will be. But if your income is below our minimums for a subsidy,
then I can refer you to our FlowerAid department.

Customer: FlowerAid?

Receptionist: Yes, Flowers are a right. Everyone has a right to
flowers. So, if you can't afford them, then the government will
supply them free of charge.

Customer: Who said they were a right?

Receptionist: Congress passed it, the President signed it and
the Supreme Court found it constitutional.

Customer: Whoa! I don't remember seeing anything in the
Constitution regarding flowers as a right.

Receptionist: It is not really a “Right in the Constitution,”
but ObamaFlowers is Constitutional because the Supreme
Court Ruled it a "Tax". Taxes are Constitutional. But we feel
it is a right.

Customer: I don't believe this.

Receptionist: It's the law of the land sir. Now, we anticipated
most people would go for the Silver Package, so what is you
monthly income sir?

Customer: Forget it, I think I will forgo the flowers this year.

Receptionist: In that case sir, I will still need your monthly
income.

Customer: Why?

Receptionist: To determine what your 'non-participation' cost would be.

Customer: WHAT? You can't charge me for NOT buying flowers!

Receptionist: It's the law of the land, sir, approved by the Supreme
Court. It's $9.50 or 1% of your monthly income.

Customer interrupting: This is ridiculous, I'll pay the $9.50.

Receptionist: Sir, it is $9.50 or 1% of your monthly income, whichever
is greater.

Customer: ARE YOU KIDDING ME? What a rip-off!

Receptionist: Actually sir, it is a good deal. Next year it will be 2%.

Customer: Look, I'm going to call my Congressman to find out what's
going on here. This is ridiculous. I'm not going to pay it.

Receptionist: Sorry to hear that sir. That's why I had the NSA track
this call and obtain the make and model of the cell phone you are using.

Customer: Why does the NSA need to know what kind of CELL PHONE
I AM USING?

Receptionist: So they get your GPS coordinates sir.

Door bell rings, followed immediately by a loud knock on the door

Receptionist: That would be the IRS sir.
Thanks for calling ObamaFlowers.
Have a nice day and God Bless America.

well written.

depressing.

It's truly sad to watch this once fine nation melting down.

Surely 51 percent of the population finds this to be just bat shit crazy. Right?

If those flowers were not planted with: http://www.flowershell.com/ then I don't want any. [hahhah-no]

Very well written! So well written it's kinda scary and it really wasn't that outlandish for me to read this and think about it happening. That's even scarier!

As far as I know and the way I understand it all, this is pretty accurate. I just can't see this lasting very long. People will figure it out and get this crap nixed fairly soon I have to think.

They passed it to see what was in it, now we know, now we can repeal it.

Sad as it is, it's here to stay. They're adding new pages to the law as we speak. It's evil. Pure and simple. Nothing to do with politics or elections or anything else. Part of the gubment of evil, and that's not solved by either voting or revolution...