Joke of the Day

[GilpinGuy]

In 1202 A.D. Muslims invented the first condom by using the last few inches of a goat's intestine.

By 1487 A.D. the British started removing it from the goat it first.

[sellersm]

Got this in an email today:

Top Ten Reasons Why Men Prefer Guns Over Women


And here we go...

#10 - You can trade an old .44 for a new .22.

#9 - You can keep one gun at home and have another for when you're on the road.

#8 - If you admire a friend's gun and tell him so, he will probably let you try it out a few times.

#7 - Your primary gun doesn't mind if you keep another gun for a backup.

#6 - Your gun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo.

#5 - A gun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.

#4 - Guns function normally every day of the month.

#3 - A gun doesn't ask , "Do these new grips make me look fat?"

#2 - A gun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.

And the Number One reason
Why Men Prefer Guns over women.....

​

#1 - You can buy a silencer for a gun

[Scanker19]

What's the worst thing about getting your keys locked in your car outside an abortion clinic?





Having to go in to ask for a coat hanger.

[Great-Kazoo]

hear about those 2 gay irishmen.
Michael Fitzpatrick
and
Patrick Fitzmachael

What;s light brown and floats?
Natalie Wood

[henpecked]

A married couple is lying in bed one night. The wife is curled up, ready to go to sleep, and the husband turns his bed lamp on to read a book. As he's reading, he periodically reaches over to his wife and fondles her special bits. He does this a few times, but only for a very short interval before returning to read his book. The wife gradually becomes more and more aroused and, assuming that her husband is seeking some encouragement before going further, gets up and starts stripping in front of him. The husband is confused and asks, Why are you taking off your clothes? His wife replies, You were rubbing me downtown. I thought it was foreplay. The husband says, No, not at all. His wife asks angrily, Well, what the hell were you doing then? I was just wetting my fingers so I could turn the pages in my book.

[DEAGLER]

A married couple is lying in bed one night. The wife is curled up, ready to go to sleep, and the husband turns his bed lamp on to read a book. As he's reading, he periodically reaches over to his wife and fondles her special bits. He does this a few times, but only for a very short interval before returning to read his book. The wife gradually becomes more and more aroused and, assuming that her husband is seeking some encouragement before going further, gets up and starts stripping in front of him. The husband is confused and asks, Why are you taking off your clothes? His wife replies, You were rubbing me downtown. I thought it was foreplay. The husband says, No, not at all. His wife asks angrily, Well, what the hell were you doing then? I was just wetting my fingers so I could turn the pages in my book.

Ha! Nice.

[encorehunter]

This morning I lucked out and was able to buy several cases of ammo.

On the way home, I stopped at the gas station and this drop dead gorgeous blond was filling her car at the next pump. She looked at the ammo in the back of my car and said in a very sexy voice, "I'm a big believer in barter, boy. Would you be interested in a trade, sex for ammo?"

I thought it over for a few seconds and responded......"Well, just what kind of ammo do you have to trade?"




Sorry, I stole this from another forum, but I had a good laugh and thought I would pass it on.

[soldier-of-the-apocalypse]

I dont think I would be interested in that deal if I lived in Trinidad, just saying

[drift_g35]

I dont think I would be interested in that deal if I lived in Trinidad, just saying

[sniper7]

I dont think I would be interested in that deal if I lived in Trinidad, just saying

Damn that is funny!