As this thread has been developing, I have been both learning and thinking.

Our household understanding is this;
1) If there is a loud noise in the house, nobody is allowed to check it out other than me. If for any reason they see my flashlight (they all know what my tac lights look like, I have shown them...) they are not to move.
2) if I have to shoot, I will if nobody is behind the crook.
3) I will not shoot if there is a hostage, unless there is a lot of room between them and the crook. If there is a gun to their head, then forget it. Me shooting the crook in the head will only cause him to pull the trigger (muscles contract as a reaction to force). I'm not a sniper, I'm not trained to make an incapacitating shot. I drop the shotgun, they make a mistake and end up with a bunch of 40 S&W holes in them........ Theoretically....

I like the shotgun now more than my XD, the descussions here helped that. That's not to say I won't have the pistol tucked into my waist band.

For practice, I like to shoot at the local combat and defensive competitions. I am waiting for some of the local instructors to put on a low light/no light class for pistol and whatever other weapons they will teach. I also target shoot and dry fire practice as well. I like Gabe S.'s book. It showed me just how much of a neophyte I was/am.

I'm sure there is holes in my plan, but we had to start somewhere. I have 6yr old and 12yr old daughters plus wife and her mother. Two in the basement, three in the upper level. Psychotic dog in my closet (no joking, big walk in closet).

Greg